100 days in the life: Week 3 Roundup.

Week 3 Roundup.

Well, despite only having three appointments this week, it was a week just chock-a-block full of frustration.

While I was able, for the most part, to stick to the scheduled plan, there were so many psychological obstacles, that I began missing food mightily. I decided to give into the yearning, only to find out that food is indeed, my enemy, at this point.

I have no idea which nerves the docs severed in my surgery, but it's clear that it's been food right along, (and NOT caffeine) that triggers the pain in my pelvic floor. Caffeine probably doesn't help, (since it just makes me irritable and edgy, and pretty much makes my head feel like it will explode) but it's apparently the lesser of two evils, for now.

I would hazard a guess that asking my digestive tract to do anything at this point is a mistake, because it simply takes far too much energy for my body to digest food, which robs my brains ability to supply the necessary endorphins that have been helping to mask the chronic pain.

That's my best guess anyway, and it seems as good as anything I can get, by way of diagnosis, from the medical establishment. Nerves are such a strange bodily mechanism, and only so very minimally understood. Sheesh.

If I could only tell that little voice inside me, that finds comfort in food, to back the fuck up, and get back on the bus, then all would be well.

The trouble being, of course, that when you've been addicted to food, as long as I have, it's not quite that simple.

It's not helping that the lack of food is making me completely enervated, or at least, that's what I tell myself.

The truth is that food isn't giving me any energy, at all.

But neither is fasting, and I would have thought that the "kick" from fasting, would have "kicked-in" by now. (It did, by this time, last summer; so much for expectations.)

So, it's not just that the emotional withdrawal is problematic, but add lack of energy, lack of motivation, lack of mental clarity, lack of patience, and being in some sort of chronic pain (whether emotional or physical) and you kind of get where I am at.

Pretty much blows.

I just know that food (or perhaps, the action of eating it?) gives me some sort of indefinable boost.

It doesn't seem to matter that the boost is false and does not do what the emotional anticipation says it will, i.e., give me energy.

But, I guess that's the nature of having an addiction in the first place.

I am at my wit's end just trying to get out from under it, though, so I it looks like I will be repeating week 2, a bit longer, and worrying about the other addictions (caffeine and casein), later.

It's early days yet, and while I am extremely frustrated with it, (to the point of not being able to stand myself, even) I have to have patience, that this will, eventually, become my "norm".

 

I will stop missing the false comfort that food gives me. I will begin including adequate and consistent self- care into my life. I will learn how to live in a way that is healthy and fulfilling. I will do without the addiction, just like I have done all the other times in my life, when I was trying to make lasting changes.

Making these affirmations a mantra, seems to be the only thing I am capable of, at present.

I just have to have the patience and fortitude to realize this, (I'm thinking maybe that's the current lesson) and remember it, BEFORE I turn to the same old habit of stuffing food in my mouth, for comfort.

 

After all, when people without food addictions, have trouble with digestion; they simply stop eating.

Of course, they aren't me and I am not them, and so, merely the act of remember to tell myself that if I eat; "IT WILL LEAD TO PAIN, FRUSTRATION, AND DISCOMFORT; feels like an impossible, overwhelming task, most days.

An all-consuming task, in fact.

What I really need is to check into a sanitarium. A nice long stay, in a nice padded, rubber room, (where all they feed you is soup), should do the trick.  (Now I surely know why my mother had so many nervous breakdowns; likely the only way she could truly rest and recharge her batteries.)

The truth is that I am in such a place of struggle, that even that, at this point, would likely be small comfort.

Probably just as well that it's unaffordable, because if I had to grasp at such a straw, and it failed to help, then what would I do?

100 days in the life; week 3.

Week 3-August 26-August 31, 2012.

            I realized from comparing week 2 to week 1, that in order to stay on track, my goals should be more specific, especially in light of the fact that I DO have two standing appointments on alternate weeks; so those weeks MUST be somewhat regimented. 

          This week is one of those weeks. 

         So.............for week three, I am going to try and be very specific and not very flexible. Also, because of the pain, I am planning on taking a full Amitrytaline on the days I also ingest caffeine, as well as committing to myself, to USE the massage tools on those days. 

        This is very important, and ever so helpful. 

       For some reason, I can use the thumper on my back and neck, for just hours, and get good results. The minute I have caffeine, however, I have to start over, as those muscles all just tense right back up. Plus, my surgical residual pain increases, substantially. It almost doesn't seem worth it, at times, hence why I'd like to give it up entirely. (BUT, it SO helpful when one is tired and lacking calories, so to get through the first few transitions, I believe it's necessary to cut back very, very, gradually. Same with dairy, as it has casein in it, which is very addictive and therefore will cause numerous withdrawal symptoms, if eliminated too abruptly).

            Additionally, I would like to get some full stretch sessions in, (the Miranda DVD's) on the alternate days, which happen to be Mon.Wed.Fri. this week. I would also like to increase Vitamin C, B & Enzymes, to 2x a day. So, in the interest of getting my intentions out to the Universe then, here's my plan for week three:

Sunday:

Caffeine Okay Today (with 2% milk, only).

Up & Down, or Up & Over, Chipman Hill. 3 Sets of Kegels & Abs with the ball.

Full round of stretching with the Pilates arc and the usual floor stretches.

Full bevy of vitamins when I am done (plenty of Hibiscus Rose Hip tea on hand).

Ginseng slices (no more then two pcks) perfectly okay.

Coconut water, herb tea, any juices a-okay. Veggie Juice for dinner w/miso.

Homedics cushion along with leg compression and thumper. 1 full Amitryptaline (10 mg).

Monday:

No caffeine today (not even the thrice-brewed). Stick to cacao & nut milk. Would like to work in an extra stretch session. Apt. with Sharon. Walk dog, twice. Same food regimen as Sunday. 1/2 Amitryptaline this p.m.

Tuesday & Thursday same as Sunday. 

Wednesday & Friday, same as Monday.

Saturday now becomes the "flex" day.

Notes to self:           

Try to stick with thrice-brewed Pur-eh, even on days of allowable caffeine, unless I become exhausted and really need the boost of the 1st steep.

Will need to make Essiac from scratch this week, as I ran out of liver support. 

100 days in the life. End of Week 2.

Week 2 Roundup.

Week 2 goals.

1) Decrease caffeine to no more then 1 mug, (8 ounces tea/8 ounces 2%milk) three days of the week.

2) Decrease smoothies to one per day. 

3) Increase Exercise to include at least 2 walks up and over Chipman hill and at least 3 full sessions of stretching and calisthenics.

4) Use the cushion, the thumper, and the leg compression, at least 3 rounds, (1 hour) at least three days.

5) Use the binaural thera-tappers and the guided meditation tracks, at least 3 (1/2 hour) sessions, minimum of 3 days.

6) Take entire host of vitamins, daily, with the dopamine releaser (2-3 squirts per day).

7) Nice hot, sitz baths, on the days I hike.

How did I do?

            I wasn't thrilled with this weeks accomplishments, but the good thing is that I did not give in to eating solids. This week brought home the fact that the things which trip me up and make me less then successful at meeting goals, are STRESSORS of any kind; especially stress that interferes in my day to day rhythm of self-care.

            This week, I had the added responsibility of showing our apt. that is soon to become vacant. This took an awfully lot of time that I just didn't have in excess (not to mention the energy suck that it entailed). I also had to do some 'catch-up' visits.

            All of this just threw things off and because I couldn't stay on an even keel with my days, I got pushed completely off-center. Hence, I missed my rigidly scheduled wean off caffeine (I wanted to have it every other day; partly to reduce toxic withdrawal, and partly to keep physical energy levels adequate for every-other-day, robust hiking). A Monday/Wednesday/Friday schedule seems to work the best for me, in this endeavor. This leaves the weekend free to be flexible (which is what usually needs to happen, when including someone else's agenda into the picture of our lives (that include relationships, anyway)).

            I found out this week that having such a rigid during-the week-schedule with the self-care worked into it, is just critical, because if it doesn't happen, then I self-sabotage.

            Having said that, it could have been worse. At this point, I'll just be repeating week 2, (which was actually built-into the plan), so it's not too awful much of a setback.

                                     So.............where did I do well?

I DID take the entire bevy of vitamins, every day, except for one.

I DID decrease smoothies to one 16oz per day.

I juiced veggies for dinner, every night (as hot soup, w/miso).

I got two good hikes in, and three days of calisthenics/stretches.

I DID decrease the caffeine to only 3 days, but not in the right sequence, like I'd planned (I ended up having it Tuesday, Wednesday & Thursday, because I got behind on exercise and had to push Thursday). Which means I had a serious withdrawal headache Friday and Sat., along with all the other typical unpleasant toxic dumping symptoms. (Friday and Saturday were TOUGH; the toughest days so far).

I DID manage to use the cushion and the thumper, at least 3 days.

I only achieved one guided meditation (and that was in my weekly therapy session), and only 1 bath.

So...........guess I'm repeating week 2. Hopefully, I'll nail it this week, and stay on schedule for the 3-week mark transition into straight juicing.

Moving right along............ :)

100 days in the life.

100 DAY FASTING PLAN.

My general plan is to ease into a 10 day master cleanse, with a true water fast sandwiched between the two 5 day master cleanses, and then ease out of it, with several weeks of juice-feasting and/or smoothies, on either side.

Here is what I imagine it will look like:

Weeks 1-3: devoted to just adjusting to changes (no solids, and therefore, no need to take laxatives (oxy-powder), and eliminating caffeine and pulpy liquids). 

Weeks 4-7. Smoothies, as necessary.  

Weeks 5-6: 5 days of Master Cleanse, followed by 4 day Straight Water w/Basil, Lime, anything to add interest, followed by 5 days of Master Cleanse. 

Week 7-10: straight juices. 

Weeks 10-14: add smoothies back in, as tolerated.

I am also dedicating the time to making myself (and self-care) a priority. I have assembled a pretty good toolbox, which should help. (I have downloaded binaural feedback tapes, purchased the Miranda DVD's, (for stretching daily), have the back massage cushion and the leg massagers, as well as the thumper, which I am committed to using, daily). Also, when it comes to exercise: I've decided that less is more, and that more frequent, less-intense, workouts, followed by stretching and the occasional robust hike, is the way to go.

 

End of Week 1 report: August 19, 2012.

Well, so, it's been a week. There have been moments of fatigue, and hunger, but nothing major. I did have a headache mid week, (which I ended up taking Ibuprophen for...........probably the daily caffeine from the tea, but could also be detoxing as I've definitely got the fuzzy tongue). 

I allowed myself any and all liquids I wanted, including yogurt smoothies, milk, juice, caffeinated tea/coffee and nut/seed milk cacao w/agave sweetener, along with a whole host of vitamins (which I took at least every other day). I've only lost 1/2 pound, but my B.M's, were much more regular then I expected. 

I have used the Homedics cushion several days, and the thumper every night, the last two or three nights. Early in the week, I had reduced my Amitryptaline to a half, but with all the caffeine I ingested, I am now up to a whole one. That should change, again, this week, as I am trying to eliminate caffeine, as of tomorrow (Sunday, Aug 20th). 

I am feeling better about it, all around, this time. Don't know why, but suspect the self-care piece is crucial. I DID have almost an entire watermelon tonight, but feel okay about it, as I DID climb Chipman Hill last night, and Buck Mt. today. Finished the rest of the quart of yogurt, mixed into a smoothie, with nuts and coconut, for dinner. 

So, basically, these first few weeks are transitional phases (first all raw, then all juice, then MC, etc.) 

Right on task! Stay tuned!

This spring, for the first time ever, there were desperate people, living up behind the house, in a very public park like space, which borders hiking trails. They were there for several weeks, and even though I felt somewhat invaded, I did not report them to the police. I found the situation to be unsettling, but not threatening. It was clear that the couple was merely down on their luck, and trying to create function and stability in their lives.
It also made me feel sad and torn, that our economic climate has made even small towns, in the middle of nowhere, subject to providing housing for what I refer to as "the transient folk".
When I lived further south, this same phenomenon would transpire in the summer (the river folk population would swell enormously), but it wasn't for over twenty years before the nearby woods also became a regular haunt.  When I left that area, there were at least two families, that I know of, residing permanently in tents and lean-tos, all around the town. They would pick up and move every few weeks. Some of them had very small children, babies, even. It saddened me greatly, to be witness to it. This was a gradual, and albeit hidden process;I was likely only one of a few who even noticed the expansion. I was sad to leave there, but not for this reason. Truthfully, the burgeoning homeless population became increasingly violent and unpredictable, with much untreated mental-illness in the mix. It got so even if you wanted to help, it was dangerous and unnerving to brush up against the population at times.
Desperadoes, are well, desperate.
They will make decisions that they would never have made before they were desperate, just due to changing circumstance. Many of them, once arriving in our mostly liberal state, began packing firearms (who knows how, or where, they got them?). The combination of no gun laws, and mental illness + no home, can be, well, dangerous.  Dangerous and desperate. I learned this first hand, as  a child, and not really wanting to live around it, I wasn't too sad to move away from this aspect of the old town. For awhile, the new town remained geographically remote enough, not to entice this urban overflow.
I guess, truthfully, I should have realized, that along with the economic collapse, there is literally no place remote enough, for people wanting to survive, to turn their noses up at resources; especially if they seem free or in excess.
I decided that I was spooked enough after seeing these folks living on the hillside, to eventually purchase a shotgun, for home protection. Just in case the desperadoes, well, get really desperate. They could get desperate enough to start raiding the countryside. Maybe not tomorrow. Or next week. Or even next year. But, along with several friends, I believe it will come. It's the nature of revolution. Anyone who eats regularly, during a revolution, is  suspect. That would be us. We will need to protect ourselves.
So...........back to the point of this blog..........I began the process of researching my rights and obligations. Just in case, you know, the desperados should someday show up at my door, and insist I feed them, or something else, not as nice.
Turns out Vermont has NO laws concerning personal gun control. I only had two specific questions for someone, indeed, anyone, at the state level.
My two questions (which I have  not yet, despite numerous hours of research, gotten an answer for):
1) Is there any kind of law for carrying a concealed weapon? CAN i obtain a Concealed Weapon Permit, for my handgun, or should I just walk around with it, on my ankle,hip,shoulder/back, permit-less?
2) Can you please tell me what the law says I should do?
3) What is the obligation to retreat , in Vermont? Specifically, is there some sort of obligation to retreat, if someone is invading my home, intent on stealing my things, either to hock, or to eat? I mean, should I jump out my 14 foot high window, and hop in my car, to avoid them, or do I shoot them, or feed them, or both? Feed them, then shoot them, especially if they are greedy, and want desert?
4) If I shoot them, what happens? Am I protected by State Statute as blameless?
Well, okay, yea, that's 4 questions, that's true.
The ONLY one I have an answer to, is question #1.
Nope, there's no permit process in our lovely liberal state. Carry it concealed, Carry it out in the open. Nobody cares. Well, alright then. Can do. Moving onwards and upwards.
My next questions:
I first started at the Attorney Generals webpage. There's a pretty general page there, stating that you can't bring a gun into a public, state, or federal building. Common Sense right? On account of, you know, they have those signs and now, scanners. And of course, no schools, shopping centers, or library's, etc. Although, without needing a permit, and without having to go through a scanner, who would know whose breaking the law on this one? It's gotta make ya' wonder. It certainly did, me. :(
They couldn't (or wouldn't) answer my very specific question. They referred me to the sheriff's office, who couldn't (or wouldn't) answer my questions, either. They referred me to the ATF; because they felt it was a federal issue, due to the fact that Vermont has so few gun laws (huh?). So............if I shot someone who had invaded my home, the ATF would come in and do what, exactly?
Well, now I was really dumfounded, and figuring someone had to know something, I found a local ATF branch number in Burlington, and got a call back, today. The guy I spoke with (a former state police officer in MA.) and I, had a very nice conversation, which ended with his recommendation that I call the Attorney Generals Office. Which I did, and since there are so few gun laws in Vermont, their only recommendation, since I was researching anyway, was to look at the justifiable homicide statute. WHOA. Well, we had quite a few laughs about that one, I can tell ya' so.
Their final recommendation was to contact an actual attorney at the Addison States Attorney's office. Oh, yea. I should have done that, in the beginning. Stoopid me.
Except, well, they won't talk to you, as they work for the state and if you need this kind of specific information, their recommendation is to contact a private attorney, pay for it, and get your answers there. Because, you know, it's all situational. As a citizen of this state, there is NOWHERE and I mean NOWHERE, to look up cases where particular incidences of home protection were NOT prosecuted by the States Attorney's office. There's too much gray in both the law, and the minds of the bureaucrats, who enforce it. It's entirely situational, don't you know?
Which, of course, ended with me right back to the beginning.

I don't know about you, but my head is spinning. And I still don't know the best way to deal with that potential intruder. 

Do I stay and shoot? Run and shoot? 

Or maybe, if this should happen, I should just say: "Hey, take anything you want, but please don't make me shoot you. It's far too complicated a thing, from you know, a legal standpoint!".
Justifiable Homicide aside, what's a person to do? I guess if I want to commit 300 bucks towards the shotgun, I should also commit another 200 bucks to the private attorney, to make sure, you know, that the potential intruder doesn't die with my home-made chocolate, on their lips, or in their belly. Boggles the mind, doesn't it?

The Political Structure of Vermont

Certain things have happened to me at the political level, in Vermont, which have left me confounded, confused, dismayed and distraught.

I seem to be the kind of person who refuses to just turn a blind eye to injustice. Because of something that happened years ago, I had thought I had made my peace with the fact, that the price for yelling: "Hey, The Emperor has no clothes on!", means that I was blacklisted statewide, and the only way I could make a living in this state, would be to work for myself. Unfortunately, because I refuse to put up with bullshit, even that has it's limitations. Even when people like my work, they won't buy it. Who knows why? If I were even a tad more paranoid, I'd say that it's because they are worried about appearances.

When I can maintain any kind of objectivity, I usually scoff it up to the fact that my creative work straddles too many lines and since it can't be categorized, then it is dismissed. I am not famous enough for my work to be heralded (by the sycophants of the world), and my furniture pieces are not technically good enough to be considered accomplished, and because all of it, together, defeats categorization, it is admired and then, dismissed.

I've tried hard not to take this personally, but it's been really, really, really, difficult. I know, from knowing myself very well, that part of me does want recognition, but more then that, I just want my work (and the time and effort I put into it) to count for something. Even if it only counts to my family and friends.

But even that, seems too much to ask. So now, now I am at a crossroad. I know (from an objective standpoint) that the cost of being one of "those" people, with "A Beautiful Mind", is rejection, ridicule and even dismissal, but the reality of living with this dynamic, I am finding impossible to bear. Just impossible.

It doesn't help that the very people who I thought I could count on (family and friends) are also among the simpletons who want the association of being with "The Beautiful Mind" part of me, but can't stomach, never mind accept, that there is a cost associated with all that I have born, which has found a channel of expression, in the creative part of me.

Isaac Newton even said it. Energy MUST go SOMEWHERE as it can't be increased nor decreased, just diverted.

That is true of most creative genius's, they are rarely understood or applauded, until they achieve notoriety, or death. And then, all of a sudden, they are everybody's darling. All of the barely there followers, now want to wash their boots, and carry their coats. Gah.

Truthfully, this kind of adulation is quite sickening to me, and is not something I would ever want. I would really become a recluse, if I DID ever get famous, out of sheer self-preservation from the sycophants of the world.

However, having said this, what I would want, is the understanding from family and friends, that the creative genius side of having the aforementioned "Beautiful Mind", has a COST associated with it. I have born that cost, for the most part, bravely and adeptly, with humor and resilience, to the point where I have found, that my lovers quarrel with the world of humans, must, by necessity, exert itself occasionally, with the refrain that the emperor has no clothes.

As far as I can tell; SOMEONE has to say it. And since I have nothing to lose by doing so, (as Janis Joplin said: Freedom is another word, for nothing left to lose), then I must do. Especially when it involves injustice of monumental proportions.

I do it. Even if it means I am shunned and rejected, by the entire world, but even if it means also, that my family and friends refuse to accept it. As far as I can tell, there are just too many sheep (in the form of humans) out there, already. I never wanted to be one of them. So, I am not. I've already paid the price, tenfold.

Because I am a very fair-minded person, I don't think that others (who have to work here in the state), should have to bear the cost, as well. I know that people almost have to be schizophrenic to deal with the political manifestations of working in this long (but small) state. I do know that. Freedom for me means that I don't have to play this sickening sycophant game, anymore. So, I don't.

I thought I had made it clear that I was willing to spare those I cared about, from the mayhem that ensues, when one person does not wish to bite their tongue, when things go badly awry. I guess, that too, went mis-understood. For that, I am sorry.

The objective part of me feels truly sorry for the people who have to live with someone that has "A Beautiful Mind". Another part of me wishes they'd just buck up and realize that everything that makes us up as humans, has costs associated with it. Most of my research into other people through the ages, who were creative genius's, has shown that there was a downside to their personality. Most of the time, a pretty big downside.

Collectively, the thing that doesn't show up in their stories, is whether or not the people who cared about them, could accept this about them, and love them for it, anyway; understanding that it was just part of their psychological make-up. Sure, in hindsight, they seem to, when the stories get told, as epitaphs. But, in reality, I suspect that these stories get told, just because the people involved, COULDN'T understand them, during their lives, so they had to alleviate their guilt (and work through their own despair at their failure) by creating a story in which their loved ones creative genius was heralded, post-mortem.

Fat lot of good it does them, then, hey?

Well, I am also reminded of the people who knew this about themselves (there aren't that many, neither in stories, nor in historical accounts), and chose to remove themselves from further engagements with people they care about, in order to spare them both, further struggle. Because there's truly no denying that living with creative genius/'s, IS an incredible struggle. For them. For the people they love. For the people who love them. It's truly difficult.

Maybe the best humans CAN do, is applaud them post-mortemly? I suspect so. It is for this reason that I suspect people commit suicide. They know. It ends up being a giant "fuck you", really. I totally relate. "You can't love me while I am living, so maybe you'll realize how badly you fucked up, when I am dead, and you miss being massaged, spiritually, by being in the presence of all that creative energy." Yea, I suspect that's pretty much the purpose of suicide. God knows I've thought about it, so many times. But, I won't do it. I won't waste the life the Goddess gave me, by even playing the game in this respect.

I've vowed to myself, that I won't stoop to that meanness that lies latent in the spirit of humanity, which only allows for love retrospectively. It's tawdry, and small, and so incredibly base; this inability to love and cherish the people who come into our lives. To see the gift, and want to be surrounded by it's power of life, all the while knowing that one doesn't have the courage to find it for oneself. Inviting it in because one doesn't have the courage to create it, for oneself, and then dismissing it, when it fails to satisfy, because it is shown to have marks of some sort or other. Such is the baseness and smallness of human nature. So incredibly flawed, this inability to love and cherish the gifts we are given.

It doesn't say much for the human race, does it?

Well, what I can do, and will do, is just remove myself from the mix. Just like an "Etch-a-Sketch". Shake it and it's gone. Or like the "Never-ending Story".........."why, it's like the nothing never was"...........

So. Be. It. Miss me when I am gone. Fat lot of good that'll do ya'.

As I am reading this, it comes to mind that maybe that's the point, actually. Negative based humans need negative based everyday trauma, to feed on and stay alive.

This is likely how it'll play out: "That Mona, she was a genius, and she had the best, most fun, energy, ever, but she wasn't worth living with, on account of, you know, she was nuts and it made us afraid, so finally she left. Oh, poor us."

Yea, that about sums it up, don't it?

Day 8 (or is it 7, on account of Friday's mishap?), whatever.

Today, I thought I'd say a little about Dairy. I've included Milk (organic) and Kefir (yogurt) in the first phase of my transition, because I found that it helps to coat my stomach, not only with mucus, but also with the added probiotics from the Kefir. These are two things that I need rather desperately, right now.

My body happens to need the mucus because of the fact that I have had chronic diarrhea for the past few years, (western medicine has failed to determine the culprit), so much of my natural mucus has been eliminated. I know this because I see it in the toilet, and also because I have a constant dry mouth and throat.

While there may be other things that might help to build mucus (seaweed being one of them); I found out not too long ago that the fat from milk helps to encourage the liver to produce bile. Since lack of bile is another medical issue that I have been struggling with (i.e., gallbladder issues; either I don't have one, it's atrophied, or it's inflamed), I feel that if there's any chance at all for this to be true, then I should give my liver what it needs.

I also feel that with the chronic diarrhea, I must surely need as many probiotics as I can get, so I am not necessarily cutting out Kefir, either. I do intend to set aside some time in the next weeks, though, and try to figure out a source for raw milk and some starter to enable me to make my own.

Having said that, I also DO intend to cut out most (if not all) dairy, over the course of the next few days.

I DO have leftover irish moss seaweed still soaking in water (from the holidays) and I just incorporated the healthiest batch of sprigs, into a gallon of nut milk that I finally got around to making. Along with a Tblsp. of lemon juice, this should stay fresh enough to get me through the next week, or so.

I also have organic non-gmo soy milk as a back-up, if need be, but I am also going to try and make my own soy-milk, sometime in the next few weeks. I know the hype about soy-milk, and I am not the least bit concerned about the build-up nasties that occur with consistent use of the stuff, as I will be switching back and forth, quite regularly, between soymilk, kefir, milk, and coconut milk.

Let's see.........is there anything else I wanted to talk about, today?...........I guess there's not too much.

Physically, I feel better then I did last week at this time. My walks and stretching are helping to release the constant phlegm in the back of my throat (which may or may not be, milk related, as I did have a pretty good cold a couple of weeks ago).  I did have a slight headache this a.m., and some dehydration, but all and all, I feel, on the whole, pretty clear and like my body is clearing itself out, some. I seem to remember my teenage years, constantly clearing phlegm from the back of my throat, in response to a cat allergy, so it does not concern me greatly. I think purging dairy short-term, will be a very good thing, tho, in helping it to continue to clear up. Adding in the seaweed will hopefully aid in keeping my mucus membranes lined sufficiently, so that I am not clearing/coughing/swallowing, all the time.

Other then that, I have begun the process of only pulpy liquids (in the form of smoothies) in which I integrate super green food powder, raw protein, milk-thistle powder, frozen fruit, fresh juice, flax seed oil, and clover sprouts. Along with the veggie/medicinal soup puree that I have at night (for dinner), I am feeling quite confident and in control. My stomach has started to grumble a lot less, and my detox symptoms are quite manageable. The best thing, though, is that I have stopped taking Oxy-powder, (a supplement with laxative like qualities), every single day (which is a necessity for me, when eating solids).

So, even though I am not feeling close to wanting to switch over to juices only, at this point in time, I am confident that I will know the right time to do so, and will be ready, willing and able, when that time arrives.

On that note, I am signing off with some food for thought (no pun intended), and that is that we are not all one size, so our diet and/or fasting processes, should not be, either. :)

This is Rara Avis, signing off from The House of Found Goods.